Korrektur < Korrekturlesen < Englisch < Sprachen < Vorhilfe
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(Frage) beantwortet  | | Datum: | 20:47 So 02.11.2008 | | Autor: | zitrone |
Hi,
hab mal einen Text zur Frage "Would you donate money for Oxfam? Why or why not?".
Hab den Text hier reingeschrieben damit sich den jemand mal ansieht. Denn falls Fehler drinnen sind, möchte ich ja gerne daraus lernen. Könnte daher bitte sich das jemand mal angucken?
I think, I would donate money for Oxfam, because their projects are really fantastic.For examplethey want to help the Congo, where is a civil war now, to help the people in Darfur of starving and to help the people in Bangladesh, who lost their houses of a hurrican and many more other projects. They are an organization of persons, who set oneself a target, to help humans if they are in danger. . It's really remarkably that Oxfam spend so much for these projects. You could help even with a small donation to bring the work forward. But on the other hand I'm not sure if some other people use the donations for their own. Many persons even workers in such an organization, thing only of themselves and are so corrupt, that they would let poor people starve. Because of this I'm not anymore sure, if i shoul donate. If I know exactly what the people do with my money, I possibly would donate.
lg zitrone
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(Antwort) fertig  | | Datum: | 20:58 So 02.11.2008 | | Autor: | moody |
> I think, I would donate money for Oxfam, because their
> projects are really fantastic. For example they want to help
> the Congo, where a civil war takes place right now.They also like to prevent the people in
> Darfur from starving and tohelp the people in Bangladesh,
> who lost their houses due to a hurrican. They are involved in many other interessting projects.
> Oxfam is an organisation, which aims for helping humans if they are in danger.
> It's really remarkable (kein adverb)that Oxfam hast spent oder spends so much on statt for these
> projects. You could help even with a little donation to support their work.
> But on the other hand I'm not sure
> if some other people use the donations for their own purposes. Many
> persons, even workers in such an organization, think statt thing only of
> themselves and are so corrupt, that they would let poor
> people starve to fill their own account. Because of this I'm not sure anymore, if i
> should donate. If I know exactly what the people do with my
> money, I possibly would donate.
Soweit ganz gut, sorry das ich nicht jedes mal geschrieben habe was ich verändert habe. Wenn du noch fragen dazu hast, frag.
Ich finde es nur seltsam, dass du diese Organisation erst so preist und man als Leser denkt, ja da spende ich gerne. Und zack am Ende sagst du die sind wahrscheinlich eh alle korrupt und füllen ihre eigenen Taschen.
Du solltest das eventuell am Anfang erwähnen, dass einige Organisationen tuen du Oxfam aber nicht dazu gehört. Anderfalls solltest du dich mehr auf diese Gegenseite beziehen, wenn du deren Position annimmst. Dann wäre die Reihenfolge auch richtig.
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